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The Art of Connecting: What successful People Have in Common

Updated: Sep 11, 2019

What makes PEOPLE LISTEN? How can you communicate in a way that INCREASES your INFLUENCE on others? SUCCESS is not only based on talent or experience but on the ability to COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY.


"I will pay more for the ability to deal with people

than any other ability under the sun." 

–John D. Rockefeller


"If I went back to college, I'd concentrate on two areas: learning to write and to speak before an audience."–Gerald Ford,

"Nothing is more important in life than the ability to

communicate effectively.”


"If you ask me what’s the one thing you can do to be more successful,

I’d say learn to communicate." –John C. Maxwell

Successful people have one thing in common: they know how to communicate effectively. What is the secret? Connecting! You first need to establish a good connection with others to make an influence on them.

A couple of months ago I attended a networking event. I was with a small group of people when a very determined lady came towards us. She passed out her business cards, gave her 30 seconds elevator pitch and left. Do you think I will be willing to make business with her? Probably not. She violated the first principle of connecting: It is not about you. It is about others. "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"–John C. Maxwell. She did not even ask for our names. I do not want to be judgy, she probably was in a hurry, but I will tell you one thing. That business card stayed at the bottom of all the ones I collected that day.

How can I establish a good connection with others? What makes people listen? I will share 3 key ideas that, if you apply them you will be able to make any situation an opportunity for a powerful connection.

1. Connecting is all about others. The first mistake that people do in communication is to put the focus on themselves. Wrong, wrong, wrong. The focus must be outward, not inward. Do not try to impress others. Rather focus on impacting them. My friend and mentor John Maxwell says that there are 3 questions that people are thinking when you speak to them:

– Do you care for me?

– Can you help me?

–Can I trust you? Are you covering these three in your day-to-day interactions?

Then you will have the attention of others.

2. Read their body language: is the information that you are giving relevant to them? When we are communicating we need to be present in the interaction. Look for cues that show people are engaged in what you have to say. Connect in common ground. Ask questions and listen! There is no coincidence that we have 2 ears and 1 mouth. Be quick to listen and slow to speak. Push the mute bottom. Ask them questions and then bring value to the conversation. Golden rule in communication: add value first.

3. Share personal stories: the value of a powerful story that is relatable to them. People connect with others that have been successful in an area where they want to succeed. Gain their trust by sharing the stories that have brought you where you are today! I promise you. People will connect with that. They will ask you questions about how you overcame certain situations. Do not be afraid to be vulnerable when you share your stories. We like authentic human beings who are real. Life is a story. Make yours a bestseller!

Some questions for reflection:

-Have you ever gotten frutrated while giving a presentation because people were not getting it?

-Have you ever wanted your boss to understand how much value you add to the company so you could get a well-earned raise or promotion?

-If you have children, have you wanted them to listen so you could help them make better choices?

-Have you wanted to improve your relationship with a friend or make an impact in your community?

If you are not able to communicate effective you won't be able to reach your potential, you won't succeed in the way that you desire and you will forever be frustrated.


Next step

Identify 2 people in your life that if you were able to connect with them your life would be so much easier. Think of a date when you will be contacting them and practice the skills given before. Tell me how it goes!! I want to hear your experience.


If you want to learn more check out this 5 minute video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8D-zM_rODwI


Would you like to improve your communication skills? Then this training is for you.

Follow the link: https://www.rewire-now.com/effective-communication-skills


To your growth, 

Carolina Marin

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